feeling out of balance

Dear Jenn,

I’ve just gone through a stressful period of time and everything has calmed down except inside of me. What are some steps I can take when I’m feeling out of balance in life?  

Thanks, Beth


Dear Beth,

Such a great question.  I can remember many times in my past when I went through a stressful period and when it passed, I couldn’t understand why I didn’t feel any better.   I remember asking myself, how can I still feel frazzled, everything is ok now, yet, I was still left feeling unsettled.  

The thing I’ve realized is that I can change my outer world as much as I like but no matter what is happening out there it is my inner relationship I need to focus on to feel balance in any situation. So let’s focus on that—connecting with your inner self.

The first thing you need to do is stop and carve out solo time really check-in with yourself.  Stopping can feel especially hard after a go-go-go time, which makes it all the more important for you right now. You need this time to go beneath what’s on the surface.  Connect with yourself.  This carved out time may look like time spent sitting quietly, walking in nature, journaling, drawing, etc. Quiet time where you can enjoy your own company.

During this time, you can ask yourself these questions to reflect and re-connect if you like:

  • What emotions am I feeling right now?  Allow them to be here, even if they are uncomfortable.  Be with them.   Ask your feelings, "Do you need anything from me?" Perhaps, they have a message for you.
     
  • What are my thoughts saying to me?  If you are having thoughts of impossibility or judging or criticizing yourself and/or others, you may need to shift your thinking.  Ask yourself, what might a more accepting thought say right now?  It could be as simple as I’m noticing how critical I am being of myself.  I am willing to shift this.  I am willing to choose a better feeling thought.
     
  • How does my body feel physically?  Am I getting enough sleep?  Am I feeding my body nourishing foods?  Am I getting enough fresh air and exercise?
     
  • How does my spirit feel?  Am I spending enough time in nature? meditating? journaling? praying? practicing yoga? writing? painting? listening to music?

I’ve created a short audio centering exercise to help you connect with yourself.  It's only a few minutes and something you can easily do everyday to help you check in with yourself.

Learning and connecting with yourself is a life-long practice.  If you feel resistance, numbness or you can’t find the answers you seek be patient, they will come.  Make this practice part of your daily routine… a habit… like brushing your teeth each day. Slowly, slowly you will feel things shift.

Love, 

Jenn xo

PS - I'm facilitating a 6 week program in Oakville in collaboration with Kula Yoga, called Opening Your Heart on Thursdays from 7-9pm (June 23 - July 28) You will gain more awareness around what lies heavy in your heart, what keeps you from moving forward and will help you create space for more joy in your life.

PSS - If you book the Breakthrough Intensive this week, you will receive 10% off the service if you use the password:  dear beth